The Greatest Problem Ever

In case you haven't noticed, my site is busting at the seems with delightful little goodies for you to toy with. Just don't get lost and play responsibly. Its just like drugs right? I mean what's the harm? Really? (Ohh great, now I'm comparing my site to drugs. Someone please dig me out of this hole. And while your at that, please help my brother, he's crying out for attention and its not his blog either)

Tonight (since I'm writing this at 1 in the morning for some reason that I'll think up latter) I will come to you with probably the greatest problem in the history of man's existence. I have more money than I know what to do with. Please don't line up helping me resolve this quandary; this is a burden I must carry myself. I had been saving up for the last year for a much needed new and snazzy laptop, entirely due to the fact that the device I owned at that time genuinely belonged in a museum. Can you believe it was upgraded to windows 98? (Jee-whizzers Batman that's ancient!)

But as this school year kicked off "mis podres" bought me the slickest laptop west of Jake Box's swimsuit. (Don't ask me where that came from, I have no idea) Needless to say, I was suddenly stuck with predicament of abundant cash in the upwards of about $400. So I bring this problem and it's possible solutions to you and humbly ask your opinion. (Now I know that everyone will suggest that I just distribute my cabbage to all you needy people, but the only way that's happening is if you have a worthy charity you'd graciously give it to. So get inventive with those obscure charity names!)

Option #1: Video Ipod $250
Up until the last few months, the Ipod has been the essence of the latest pointless whims of our generation, but I have been swayed. I think the Ipod (or mp3 in general, Ipods are just superior) have become less of a fashion trend and more of a generally cool appliance. Besides, I'm sick of lugging around a CD case everywhere and what could be better than a portable video player?

Option #2: Car CD Player $100+installation
One thing about my beloved Mercury (besides the fact that it has no air conditioning) is that it only has a stupid cassette tape deck and unless I want to go completely retro, I can't rock to by tunes. Grrrr... Whats worse is that any use of an adapter produces mostly irritable static. The solution is one of the many sleek new car stereos at Best Buy. The downside is the need for installation and no knowledge of how long the Mercury will be in my possession.

Option #3: Office Chair $75-150
I spend most of my time in my room, diligently working away at my computer and I feel I need more than a moldy rejected dinner table chair to place my posterior. Leather? Plastic? Duct Tape? I don't care; as long as its soft, comfy and can somehow accommodate my 6'4" frame. (I think Roger will agree with me that movie theaters and airplanes are nightmares for us vertical abnormalities)

Option #4: Call of Duty 2 for PC $30
COD 3 for 360 and PS3 looks absolutely amazing,(check it out yourself http://www.callofduty.com/) but it unfortunately doesn't come out for PC. So I must resort to the second edition of my favorite computer game franchise ever. I love how cheap things get when their successors are already out. By the way, does anyone play the original Call of Duty online? I'm on a lot and I sometimes get lonely.

Option #5: PS3 $600
This really isn't an option since, for one, I don't have the cash, and I also have made a point of never buying a console right when it comes out. So this option is really more of a "keep saving up and get this lovely system in the near future" option. I won't hop on the debate wagon and be just another whiny voice in a crowd of nerds at heart. I'll leave that up to someone else. All I know is that this system looks like its worth the price and then some. (But it is like Sony to nickle and dime you everywhere else)

So there it is. What do you think? You have like three ways to let me know so get cracking.

A Few Things I Think I Think-
>I think I'll go ahead and go off on a "foods I don't understand" tirade. I've already gone off on the stupidity of salads so allow me to just let loose. Those Marie Calendar pies aren't that good! (He hath broken the 11th commandment "Thou shalt salivate in the presence of thine holy pies") Sorry Sean, but they aren't that good. The only one I would want to eat is their Key Lime, but I can still get a better one at Sam's. I also can't stand the fact that Turkey is the official meat of the holidays. Its just so... blah! What I'd give for a good Thanksgiving Brisket, or a Christmas Steak. Now I know that the Pilgrims didn't have beef back in their day, but they would have if they could have! Okay, I'm sick of this tirade.

>I think we need to make the official Jake Box Dictionary for all of the Box-isms we know and love. I've got 4 good entries and wood love for y'all to add to it. Think we could get a website going Jason?

"Nekid"-being without clothing or covering. English word-"Naked"
"Wells"-large marine mammals. English word-"Whales"
"Jest"-exactly or precisely. English word-"Just"
"Tail"-to announce or proclaim. English word-"Tell"

Sports Center-
I have now discovered that when I disagree with Ruben Sosa on an upcoming game's outcome, he will always be right. I quite comfortably picked the Colts to slap the Cowboys silly last Sunday and Ruben assured me that the Boys would pull off a big win. What do you know; this is like the third time he's done this to me. Ruben, your undying faith in your team amazes me.

Dallas has a little run going and I'm not very surprised. They, along with the Jaguars are the most unpredictable team in the league. Still doesn't mean I have to like them. (can't you just smell the animosity?) Dallas 27 Tampa Bay 17

There are a few teams that I do like this year and none more than... "da Bears." Their offence is horrible, but that defence is unbelievable. I like this team, I like them a lot. Another team would be the San Diego Chargers, who have come out of nowhere and look like they have all the cylinders firing. And what about those late risers, the Dolphins and 49's? Too late for a playoff run? I don't know; I think my pickoff record shows that.

I'll get to the Lone Star Showdown real quick and its no surprise that I'll pick the Horns over those lovable Aggies. I have officially given up on that Texas Secondary, but luckily for us, the A&M playbook comes right out of the 1960's. They'll stay in the game with some trick plays, but Colt leads his team to victory and on to Kansas City. Texas 31 Texas A&M 22

My pickoff record (17-19) This is getting ridiculous, Sean your Hawks are killing me! I'm gonna start picking those completely obscure games cause I get those right.

Houston 17 New York 24-Proof once again that the Texans have no defence.

Chicago 13 New England 6-One boring game here.

Philadelphia 14 Indy 38-Go back to your precious RCA Dome Indy and stop making me look like an idiot.

Green Bay 17 Seattle 16-This is what happens when you kill my picks Seattle.

LSU 21 Arkansas 16-I love a team with a head coach named Nutt

Florida 24 Florida State 27-There's no justification for this, I just want to see a shakeup

Oklahoma 20 Oklahoma St. 34-Bedlam in OK, fun, fun, fun...

Notre Dame 31 USC 35-That's a quandary, I loathe them both.

Video of the Week-Real Men of Genius: Really Bad Toupee Wearer


Have a great Thanksgiving with Friends and Family; I know I will. Ohh and before you go, let me give y'all a one question Thanksgiving quiz since I'm such a big trivia guy. The first to give me the answer to this question gets a high five the next time I see them. (Isn't that a great prize?) Please don't Wikipedia this, I'd like it to be straight from your head or a complete guess. There's no way to enforce this so I must rely on the honor system. Good luck.

Which President officially instated Thanksgiving as a holiday?

Later guys

Why Am I Telling This Story? I Don't Know

I know, I know everyone voted for a post on what I want for Christmas. But there are still so many days till Christmas so I'll get to that later. (thus, further diminishing any trust you had in the poll) Instead, just for irony's sake, I'm going to tell you a story. A story that has no point in being told since a certain story competition passed it up weeks ago. Dare I say, this story rivals any before it and I would challenge the current winner to seriously consider delivering the prize to me... Colin, the ball is in your court. This story is an instant classic mostly because its incredibly embarrassing for me. I know Box has about 100 of these, but luckily for you, this will be my story's world premier. So, with out further to do, I give you...

My First Fill-Up

It was the first weekend of October and the weekend of the Junior High retreat. Something about faith; don't know, don't care. My parents were off for a getaway weekend and had left me and my newly acquired drivers licence to run the household; what fun. Jonathan needed a ride that Friday afternoon and I saw it as the best time to fill up the Mercury. The needle was suspended at the 1/8th mark and, to say the least, I was not going to live out Box's little gas gauge escapade. But that's another story, isn't it Jake? As I assisted Jonny with his things, which included the largest sleeping bag in existence, Jonny suddenly insisted that his things go in the trunk. I informed him that there was more than enough space in the back seat, but he didn't care and I didn't either. I was more than ready to get rid of him for the weekend. So his possessions were placed in the trunk and even with the abnormally large sleeping bag, his stuff filled up maybe a sixth of my awe-inspiring trunk.

As we swung into the parking lot, me and Box met eyes and we greeted each other with a nonchalant nod. "Yes," I said to myself, "I am the definition of cool." Jonny sprang out of the car and made his way to the back, where he waited attentively for the trunk door to magically open while I searched the interior of the vehicle for said magical lever. As I pulled what I thought was the correct switch, Jonny quickly informed that the magic wasn't happening. "It's an old car" I thought, "I told him he should have put it in the backseat." No matter, I swiftly opened the trunk and struck up a quick conversation with Gordan as Jonny ran his things into the church in true Junior High fashion.

But I was ready to split and soon cruised out of the parking lot to complete my last objective. The traffic on westbound 290 was worse than usual so I quickly compensated and rolled into the Citgo across the highway and thus sealed my fate. Now you ladies might not no this, but us guys have a certain code of conduct when we are alone and that's to act "cool." You may say that not every guy acts this way, but, believe me, all the cool ones do. This behavior includes keeping conversation with strangers at a minimum, a relaxed and laid back composer and most likely, a heightened sense of infallibility. Up to this point in my life, I had only witnessed the payment method at stations and the vast majority was with those lovely little credit cards. To bad all I had was cash and although the idea of paying before pumping was not completely foreign to me, I had never made the connection that it was pretty much universal.

So as I coolly removed the nozzle, pressed pay with cash, and began to wait I had no idea that I was messing with the system. As the little screen continued to flash "processing," I began to sense that something was wrong, but hey, above all else, keep your "cool." However, as the fellow customers finished their business and left be standing there awkwardly with nozzle in hand, I got that little voice in my head telling me to ask for help. Now again ladies, this voice is much more prominent in your minds than in us men and for the sake of keeping "cool," we continue to try to suppress it for as long as possible. And that's just what I did, God knows being clueless is far better than drawing any kind of attention.

Unfortunately for me, both occurred that day as one of the "Apu's" from inside the station ran outside, arms flailing and screaming at me in a very heavy Pakistani accent that "You need to pay inside sir!" (I hate to use stereotypes, but why is that one so true?) Needless to say, I was soon at the desk handing the cashier some green and mumbling "20 on #5 please." It didn't help that the cashier then told me "Now you can pump you gas." Now my only objective was to fill up and get out ASAP while still somehow keeping my "cool." Of course, at that time I finally noticed that my hood was gawkily detached and at a 15 degree angle no less. (So that's what I opened back in the church parking lot) Yes, the loud thud produced from my closing of of the hood, ended any hope of my slipping away unnoticed.

This time the process was smoother up until I attempted to loosen the gas cap. I must have stood there for 2 minutes trying to finagle that thing open, when I once again got that inkling to look for directions. This time however, I just wanted to leave and all I needed to do was, God forbid, actually look at the gas cap for those little arrows. I was indeed turning the right direction and all it needed was a swift twist. But I slipped back into my car thoroughly defeated and pondering on how idiotic I had looked for the duration of what I'd call a train wreck. Yes, what was supposed to be a 2 min. pit stop mutated its way into 20 min. shame fest.

It was at this time that the state of cool shows it's better side as I shrugged it off, cranked up the radio and cruised on down the road never to return. (I hate Citgo)

A Few Things I Think I Think-

>I don't think I understand salads. I was at Texas Land and Cattle last week and passed, as I always have, on the salad and pondered to myself why people eat them. I honestly can't stand them and its not that I hate vegetables. I love me some tomatoes, corn on the cob, mashed potatoes, green peas, black olives, black eyed peas, and buttered carrots, but I hate salads. Mostly because its almost all lettuce, which is really just glorified green paper, and although most others like to choke them down with a bottle full of ranch dressing, I'd rather do without. (Would you like some salad to go with that ranch?) And its worse because most every restaurant caters only salads and when I pass, I get that snobby look like "Ohh, you don't eat salads, your such a pig." Nope, sorry. You can go on thinking that stuff is the highest beacon of health foods while I eat something good and has a texture that doesn't resemble flimsy plastic. Pass that steak please.

>I think Box hates my comments on his blog. I wrote an elongated comment on his latest post and as of now, it has yet to make it onto the site. This isn't the first time. I don't believe he ever posted my retort to his criticism of my sports picks. Hmmm...

Sports Center-

I've defended and given the benefit of the doubt to the Texas defence for this entire season and I'm done with it. Coming into this year, I assumed their secondary would be their strong point as they would be returning 3 seasoned veterans including probably one of the best CB's in the country in Aaron Ross along with 2 of the most highly touted CB recruits. But no, they suck and although our offence was less than efficient without Colt McCoy, they are solely to blame for the loss to a team that was killed by Baylor. (BTW, I don't like to make excuses for my picks, but when your starting QB is knocked out in the first quarter and your backup actually acts like a Freshman, all bets are off) The streak had to end sometime, too bad it had to happen last week. Looking forward to your visit A&M. Ohh and stop messing with our campus and get a job.

My pickoff record (14-12)

Dallas 24 Indy 42-Peyton rips the Boys to shreds.

Houston 22 Buffalo 20-Gritty to the end, Carr leads the comeback.

Maryland 31 Boston College 27-Basically I like Maryland's unies better.

V Tech 26 Wake Forrest 20-Say goodbye to this Cinderella story.

Rutgers 13 Cincinnati 17-Aren't I a stinker.

Cal 35 USC 34-No BCS for you USC!

Ohio State 34 Michigan 19-I really hate Michigan, that's why I always want Loyd Carr there.

Cincinnati 24 New Orleans 27-N.O. staying alive.

Seattle 31 San Francisco 13-Sean, these are boring games to pick, better start commenting or I'm dumping your team.

San Diego 30 Denver 32-Since when are the Chargers 7-2?

Video of the Week-Asian Trix, probably my favorite Family Guy clip I didn't repeat to my GA team. This is for you Jonny, you whining brat.

Life Generally Gets Sucky

Wow, three weeks in and I've already killed my weekly routine, but it seems like I'm on par with everyone else. Guess everyone was as busy as me. Oh and by the way... school generally sucks right now. I try, much like Box, to get a post up on Monday each week. Which is really the start of the week, not Sunday. (If only I were God or some such thing as that) This week was the accumulation of all that is wrong with the world. (Not really I'm in the pity party mood; who wants an invitation?) It was really more of the accumulation of of a bunch a homework deadlines that make me feel warm inside, which, in turn, causes me to sweat profusely.

The first round of college applications swung around this week and I spent the majority of Monday and Tuesday throwing together forms, transcripts and essays... sigh. This in turn, thoroughly screwed up the rest of the week as I desperately tried to play catch up. One thing led to the next and I soon found myself burning both ends of the candle last Thursday night/Friday morning in a desperate attempt to leave Saturday open for relaxation with friends and a night of partying/murdering.

Of course Saturday afternoon I got word that my friend, who was quite exited about coming, had been gotten the best of by a wave of allergies and couldn't even tell me in person that he couldn't attend. Once again... sigh... I still had a speech to prep for on Monday and to say the least, I staggered into this week with quite a limp along with slight feeling of defeat.

So what? Every once and a while, life gives ya a solid roundhouse kick to the face and I'll take the liberty of saying that we usually don't like it too much. Life's tough enough in the first place, so why spend all your time worrying about the future. I learned this in my Junior year, where I was gasping for air every week with no end in sight. I was sick of it, I spent so much time trying to control everything that I accomplished nothing, which, in turn, brought on the wicked side effect of depression. I hate to say it but I told God to go suck an egg and leave me alone! I can handle my own... I can't tell you how many times I've tried to shove God out. I do it without even thinking, it's almost subconscious, as if there's a part of me that wants to glorify myself. Hey what da ya know...

I've gotten better at catching myself and crawling back to God with the look of a 5 year old with his hand stuck in the cookie jar. It's not a great feeling, but its so short lived and the after affect is what I've been missing. I still give my best effort and learn from my mistakes but I let God worry about the future. (Since he's the only one that can really do anything about it) The work is still there, but there's a joy along side it because I know it will work out regardless of my efforts. So simple, but so profound. (by the way, this weekend was great. I still got to catch a movie with a friend and attend a killer party [cheesy goodness!] and at least I wasn't stuck at home with allergies)

A Few Things I Think I Think-
>I think Monday should be considered the start of the week. None of the Sunday stuff. Everyone knows that the week starts on the dreary Monday morning and doesn't get good until that liberating Friday afternoon. The same should be said for the new year. It should start in August when all that drudgery starts. I shouldn't complain too much though, all that drudgery is hopefully getting me to college.

>I don't think I understand why TV networks start shows in the middle of seasons. Where did the OC come from? Here I go thinking that these series's are rightfully gone for good and they make a entrance from out of nowhere. Then again, why should I care. I've only seen like half an episode, which is the same for about every other series out there except the Office.

>I think its getting pretty stupid how these animated kids movies are copying each other. From my count there have been 3 ant movies, 2 mouse movies, 2 zoo animal movies, and 2 penguin movies. The stories are tweaked a bit, but its beyond a coincidence anymore. These movies are cash cows and I guess the studios don't think they need much originality. The kids will drag their parents to the theaters regardless. Cha-ching.

Sports Center-
I can remember the days when I would literally cry when the Cowboys would loose a regular season game by a late field goal. But today, something deep inside me wants it to happen. I know, I know Jake I'm the worst fan ever, but for the last 3-4 years the Boys have pretty much sucked. They have talent, but they have developed the uncanny ability to loose games they should win in the most amazing ways possible. No example could be better than last weeks loss to the Washington Redskins. (hooray for Phil and his clan; why isn't Taylor ever online by the way?) I won't dabble in the specifics, but Dallas gave away that game in so many ways. When the final kick passed through the uprights, I couldn't stop laughing; they had done it again. The best explanation for my sick little obsession is that I dislike the team; the players, the coaches, THE OWNER! There are a few guys like Julius Jones, Roy Williams and Terry Glenn that I generally like, but ever since the exodus of the big three long ago, I haven't liked the team. So some part of me always likes to see them eat it good.

As for this week I'm still not going to analyze this train wreck; Just make a blind prediction. Dallas 34 Arizona 12

The Horns finally got a good thumping out of their conference schedule. I see them doing the same against the formerly great KSU. Texas 38 Kansas State 17

Welcome back to earth Aggies. Have fun thinking you were a good team? You've had spurts of greatness but need I remind you of your incomparable coach. Good thing y'all are hosting Nebraska, a team that also has spurts of greatness amongst a wasteland of mediocrity. What the heck, the 12th mam will pull through in this one.
Texas A&M 19 Nebraska 16

(don't go bonkers just yet, you won't be winning any championships anytime soon) Speaking of Championships, guess what I stumbled upon on YouTube. Probably one of the craziest sports videos ever. Yup, it's the Aggies winning. Box and Baker can enjoy this for its sports value, but I love this video because of the insane announcer's call. This guy's a psycho and from what I can tell, he must suffer from extreme mood swings and a impeccably small vocabulary. I've never heard such a change in emotion as he crosses the goal line. It's a classic. In fact, lets just make it the vid of the week.

Video of the Week-A&M Big 12 Champs (Ohh Doctor! I've just been injected with pure sugar and it's kicking in!)


My pickoff record (9-7) If you want to mock me Jake, then make some picks of your own.

Louisville 27 Rutgers 29-Just because I want it doesn't it make it so?

Tennessee 14 Arkansas 17-I guess it's the worse of two evils.

USC 31 Oregon 32-Replay help or no, go Ducks!

Houston 13 Jacksonville 28-Can I hype Super Mario any more?

San Diego 28 Cincinnati 31-Two underachieving teams here.

St. Louis 20 Seattle 24-Yes I do believe in Seneca Wallace

Chicago 19 New York 15-This'll be a good one.

Hope your life doesn't suck too much lately -Later